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Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Hugs Are What's For Dinner......

Often as I sit alone pondering new designs or working on a whimsical character my mind wanders to the days that I had no time for myself and find myself missing those days very much indeed. As the holidays grow closer the emptiness of my home bears down on my husband and I like a huge black cloud...Don't get me wrong... I love the fact our children are who they are and have taken a hold of life with a vengeance but I miss the spats, teasing and utter chaos of little feet. I never dreamed that I would have to love grandchildren via a flat screen on a computer or that it would be weeks before I would hear from one son because of civil unrest or earthquakes. Hug your children every second you get, time marches by far to quickly and empty arms is definitely that "empty". I see so many parents filling their days with so much that the children become lost in the shuffle and time continues to march on. I was guilty of this myself and now I look back and wish I had a "do-over"! If I could just see Casey dance in one more recital or sing in one more play...just one more chance to watch Chip throw that winning touchdown and one more seranade from David while he plays his guitar singing a new song he just put together....such memories! Now it is their time to find their paths and here Dan and I are cheering them on with such a tug in the ol' heart! Life is a cruel task master that it only gives us 18 years with our children and then they acquire sole ownership of their actions....not an ownership they welcome happily at times, lol. Eighteen short years to teach them about what to expect and look forward to, only if they had listened, lol....ah yes there's the rub, "IF THEY HAD LISTENED!" Dan and I have been so blessed by our three. It was a rocky road for all of us many times but because of the love and hugs, we have waded through it all and we're still able to laugh!
I think this says it best:
The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together. ~Erma Bombeck
Hug your kids...alot! I would if I could...I do often through cyber-space!


WoolenSails said...

I can lend you mine if you would like, lol.
My daughter moved back home and I would love to enjoy spending time with her, but she prefers to make me nuts instead;)


Betsy said...

Dang It Pam..I'm crying my eyes out..your words ring so true...if only we had a "Do-Over"...if only we took the time...even thou we did, that time is gone and how precious it was as we look back...now we have adults to guide and love from the sidelines of life...and yes, hugs every chance we get!!

Thank you my friend for the wonderful post...


...Miss...Maddie's... said...

Knowing first-hand the sorrow you feel separated by distance and timezones from the children we love just remember the heartbeat you shared as you carried them in the womb connects you through all eternity...
xo Susan

Alice ~ Folk Art Primitives said...

I was just like you ~ wishing they would grow up ~ behave ~ listen, etc. One thing I see is that this generation of parents is so much more involved with their kids ~ I love seeing that and try to be involved with them, too!! We live ~ we learn!! Thanks for sharing ~

Diane Duda said...

This makes me happy and sad all at the same time.
Thanks Pam.


softinthehead said...

Ah Shucks Guys...This wasn't meant to make you all sad but to remind me and all that nothing is forever and it is the simple gestures that we remember and carry with us....like hugs! Smile everyone! Pam

KatHreN said...

wow such wisdom....very true. I have a 17 yr old and I told her she can live with me forever. I dread the day she moves out. But I know she has her own life to live and all I can do is point her in the right direction. I try to hug...but being a teenager....ewwww but she gets a hug wether she likes it ot not..lol

Debbie Miller of Onion Patch said...

So true Pam. Reading this makes ne cry.
Here's a hug and kiss to you!!!

Love you LOTS!!

TheRustyThimble said...

I just love your blog and I came upon this. I too miss my children dearly and I know the emptiness you are feeling right now as well as your pride that they are individuals and have flown on to make their own marks on this great world. I have not seen my oldest 35 years old in three and a half years. my middle one 33 years old in a year and a half and she has my only grandson. The youngest it has only been about 3 months!! ONLY ......... I miss them so. Wishing you and your husband a wonderful holiday and embrace those cyber hugs extra long lol!! Blessings